Monday, January 23, 2012

Lost diary found!!


www.tettelestai.blogspot.com
I recently ran across something quite amazing... my diary.  Well, as much of a  diary as I kept.  I am not a big journaling person, which is why I am trying to get my kids to do it regularly.  There are very few entries, but I thought I would share the short series in this journal that was found while we were cleaning up the books in the school room last week.  It was a very strange feeling to be reading the thoughts of an 18 year old 'me'.  I don't remember this journal/diary and I certainly don't remember writing the things I wrote.  The final entry (we will get to that in a few weeks of ML) made me go to hug my hubby.  Oooh, suspense ;-)  I am not editing what was written, you are getting me at 18, like I was.

May 12, 1995
  I'm sitting home on a Friday night, i"m in the mood to write, so here it is.  
  Graduation is 2 weeks away.  I'm scared.  The real world is waiting to destroy the fine balance I hold on life.  what is I don't make it?  I'm that near failing government class.  I'm on contract because I've skipped too much.  I'm excited about going.  I am ready for the challenges of college life.  I'm ready to see what God has in store for me.  I'm worried that I'll fail some way, not find a job to repay my loans.
  Then there's Venezuela.  I'm going on a missions trip.  It's eating my whole summer!  My friends will all be having parties and getting drunk and I'll be out of reach teaching the Bible and building cabins.  It's a great thing to do do, but I still have those nagging doubts.  I feel very lonely right now.  All of my friends are doing something with someone.  Can is out with Nikki at a movie.  I no longer hate either of them.  I want him to be happy so I feel better.  I think it truly was love.  god has someone out there for me I hope. I want him to be strong in faith and stature.  I'd like him to be tall and smart.  I'd like him to play the piano if possible.




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4 comments:

  1. I'm not much of a journal keeper either, but after seeing what you wrote, I can just imagine what I might have, and perhaps I'm glad for that! ;-)

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  2. It's been too long since I blogged, or visited yours! Love the journal entry... and don't you love to look back and see how you've changed and grown over the years. I feel that way with my blog even, looking back at previous entries, the way I wrote or the things I struggled with, God's given so much grace and grown me in so many ways. It's so nice to have records like that!

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  3. There are passages that do sort of embarrass me, but I am going to share them anyway.  It's a good thing to see where I was and where I have grown from.  Thanks so much for stopping by :-)

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